Tag Archive | "AWOME"

AWOME to Hire U.S. Congress to Solve AOSC Financial Woes, Students Hope That “Two Wrongs Make a Right”

AWOME to Hire U.S. Congress to Solve AOSC Financial Woes, Students Hope That “Two Wrongs Make a Right”

WARD BUILDING – In light of the pending AOSC fiscal cliff, the Augusta Webster Office of Medical Education has decided to hire the U.S. Congress to help solve the financial fiasco. As part of FSM 3.0, students are now required to do a summer research project. Students seem a little trepidatious about the new requirement.  M1 Cindy Winstead stated, “I think AOSC will look good on my CV, but I’m a little worried about going into more debt. I just wasn’t expecting it.”

“We feel bad about making students go into more debt,” a spokesperson for AWOME told The Flipside. “We wanted to help the students out, so we asked ourselves, ‘Who is used to massive amounts of debt and has practice avoiding accountability for it?’ Naturally, the U.S. Congress was the first thing to come to mind.” Later this month both the House and the Senate will fly, first class of course, to Chicago and help AWOME find a solution for the flubbed AOSC funding.

M1 Tobias Trommler expressed his skepticism, “I don’t know. I just don’t know. I don’t think they’ll be able to pull it off. The cliff is too near and I think we’re doomed. I think our best bet is if they just cancel each other out. Kind of like on Jurassic Park. You know, when they’re getting chased by raptors and then the T-rex jumps in and eats the raptors? I just hope that AWOME and Congress can distract each other enough so that the rest of us can get away.”

Posted in No. 7, PoliticsComments (0)

Office of Admissions to Take Year Off, Cite Not Wanting to Hear Future Students Complain About New Curriculum

Office of Admissions to Take Year Off, Cite Not Wanting to Hear Future Students Complain About New Curriculum

WARD – The Class of 2016 was Feinberg’s most talented and diverse class yet and it appears it will stay that way for at least another year. A spokesperson for AWOME told Flipside reporters that the administration has decided to suspend all Medical Admission business for the Class of 2017.

This news comes at a time when M1 complaints about the new curriculum have subsided somewhat, but are still, well, at the level of being annoying.

“We just can’t stand it anymore,” one academic Dean, who wished to remain anonymous, explained to The Flipside in an exclusive interview. “The constant bickering and complaining is just becoming too much for us to handle mentally and we don’t want to endure another year of this, at least not right away.”

The plan is not to eliminate the new curriculum, but to eliminate next year’s M1 class altogether. That way, AWOME staff can take a break from “a bunch of new complainers,” as well as having to deal with two classes partaking in the new curriculum at one time.

“Don’t get me wrong, our Office of Admissions has done a terrific job,” the Dean added. “They deserve the time off.”

The school’s recent creation of student drop in sessions to create a time for students to voice their opinion was done so as to funnel all the complaints into a single session each week. This would limit the mental burden of AWOME.

“It hasn’t worked like we planned,” the Dean said. “Not only are they complaining at the drop in sessions, but they’re still complaining via email, in person, you name it.”

Amy Kleinfelter, an M2, is particularly upset about the decision. “I’m a tour guide. Where am I supposed to eat lunch now on Fridays?”

Posted in Local, No. 3Comments (0)

AWOME: Professionalism Form Won’t Be Given to <em>Flipside</em> “Only if it remains funny”

AWOME: Professionalism Form Won’t Be Given to Flipside “Only if it remains funny”

Posted in HEADLINES, No. 2Comments (0)


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