Archive | No. 6

Weird Kid Won’t Stop Doing “Bane” Impression

Weird Kid Won’t Stop Doing “Bane” Impression

CHICAGO – This year’s In Vivo show was well received, getting many laughs and accolades from both students and faculty. The show’s main thematic was impressive, as were the various video skits and parodies. One skit, which featured a brief Feinberg spinoff on The Dark Knight Rises, included an M1 (as the Batman villain Bane) being interrogated by an M2 who wanted to know why he was always in class. The skit mimicked the lines of the movie’s opening scene.

“Or perhaps he’s wondering why someone would schedule a plenary,” M1 Bane says to the M2, “before we’ve even learned anything.”

The writer, actor, and voice of Bane in that skit, Nick Zessis, has received many compliments and has shown himself to be very proud, perhaps too proud.

“I think this whole Bane thing has gone to his head,” an M1 anonymously told The Flipside via email. “Yeah, it’s a pretty good impression, but enough is enough. All he does is talk in that voice now. We were in anatomy lab the other day, he looked at me and yelled, ‘Your precious anatomy lab. Gratefully accepted. We will need it.’ What does that even mean?”

Charlie Hutchins, who often sits next to Zessis during lecture, has frantically asked him to quit it.

“Every day after lecture, he turns to everyone and says, ‘Time to go mobile.’ Yes, Nick, we get it, you’re about to walk home from class. Again. Stop it already.”

The impression is also used in front of faculty, even during PBL presentations.

“Bane, I mean Nick, had a learning issue about heart transplantation,” Dr. Bob Bobertson informed Flipside staff. “I couldn’t understand what the hell he was saying. I wish he would have included subtitles in his powerpoint.”

When asked to comment, Zessis could only reply, “Now is not the time for fear, doctor. That comes during the OSCE.”

Of course, there are always some dissenters. Shelia Dunkinhop didn’t think Zessis was that great in the skit.

“His Bane was mediocre at best. Dr. Cochard’s Dr. Cochard impression was better.”

***Yes, again, I realize I’ve written an article about myself. If you don’t like it, well, maybe you should write something. Seriously, if you have an idea or want to write an article, I’d love to hear from you. Why do you think it’s been like two months since The Flipside’s published an issue?***

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Ellie’s Comic Corner

Hey! Check out Ellie’s awesome doodles/comics! There’s a ton of them here. Email her if you have an idea!

Click on each picture to enlarge.

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Feinberg Students Perplexed, Delighted to Find Selves Back in High School

Feinberg Students Perplexed, Delighted to Find Selves Back in High School

CHICAGO – With the whispered excitement of Feinberg Formal pulsing through the hallways, and the lecture presentation of the 10-11th grade scientific concept of Dalton’s Law of Partial Pressures, students are elated to find themselves back in the thick of high school.

Feinberg M1 Steven Tayson relayed the sentiment:  “When I was in lecture this morning, it was bizarre. It was just like my days back at Jackson Prep.  People whispering and snickering about the dance just around the corner.  Some century-old scientific idea that a 5th grader could probably understand on the board. I almost looked down for my letterman’s jacket!”

With yesterday’s developments at hand, Feinberg administrators are looking at the best way to move forward.  Talks between administration and Sodexo, Inc. have yielded a near-groundbreaking partnership for the distribution and sale of chicken tenders, personal pizzas, cardboard pints of chocolate milk, individualized cereal boxes, and soggy crinkle-cut fries at affordable prices for students.

“I’m especially excited for the fries and milkshake machine!” declared Veronica Willingham. “We’re off of the cardio unit now…so…milk shakes are back in play!”

Some Feinberg students are less optimistic regarding today’s events.  M1 Daniel Johnston was adamant in saying:  “You know I looked at the schedule, and we have 4 histology and histopathology lectures tomorrow.  I know it was great taking it easy and learning things a fifteen year-old could most-assuredly understand and explain, but nothing’s really changed long-term.  I am looking forward to the milkshake machine though. That much is for damn sure.”

At press time, students were markedly distressed that all local florists had run out of corsages for the rapidly approaching formal.

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Feinberg Memes – CV II Exam

Check out this issue’s meme! Have an idea for a Feinberg meme? Email us!

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eMerg “Too Convenient,” More Dropdown Menus Added Over Winter Break

eMerg “Too Convenient,” More Dropdown Menus Added Over Winter Break

CHICAGO – Feinberg students returning from winter break will find an updated interface for accessing course documents as the Office of Medical Education continues to improve eMerg. Administrators raised concerns before the winter vacation that the online resource gateway had been too easy to use during the first four months of the new curriculum rolled out in August.

“Medicine is a difficult profession,” said one dean. “We want graduates of the Feinberg School of Medicine to be able to locate and access the resources they need even in the face of utmost adversity.”

After noting that first year medical students had become too complacent, the Office of Medical Education set forth to make learning guides, lecture slides and readings more challenging to find through the online resource gateway. “For starters students will have to work their way through a lot more dropdown menus to get to content now,” explained a computer programmer hired for the redesign. “Students will start by choosing an academic term, then selecting an option from a list of competency standards and then classroom location…it goes on from there, but I have a trouble remembering the exact navigation.”

More changes are planned for eMerg as the new year continues including scheduled service outages and uploading revised learning guides shortly after lectures begin. In an official statement released by the Office of Medical Education, the expedited implementation of the dropdown menu system was highlighted as an important facet of the new Feinberg curriculum. “At Feinberg we value the education of our students too highly to pass up such a high-yield opportunity to expose students to the struggles of the medical profession.”

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Next AoSC Lecture to Explain How to Use Google, Open Word Document

Next AoSC Lecture to Explain How to Use Google, Open Word Document

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M1s Still Anxiously Waiting for SAM I Quiz to Be Released

M1s Still Anxiously Waiting for SAM I Quiz to Be Released

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M2s Seek M1s for CV Pathology Tutoring

M2s Seek M1s for CV Pathology Tutoring

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eMerg to Break News to World’s Children that Santa Claus Does not Exist

eMerg to Break News to World’s Children that Santa Claus Does not Exist

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M1 Interviews Santa for Winter Break H&S Assignment

M1 Interviews Santa for Winter Break H&S Assignment

NEWS IN BRIEF

The M1 students were asked to complete a Health and Society assignment over break in which they interviewed a family member about their diet, cardiovascular disease prevention, and possible treatment. One student, unable to find an at risk family member, decided to stay up late on Christmas Eve and talk to Santa.

“I had to stay up real late,” Albert Hancock told Flipside reporters. “It was way passed my bed time. But I saw him and boy was he fat. We only could talk for about five minutes, and most of that time his mouth was full of cookies and milk, but I learned a lot.”

Hancock recorded that Santa’s LDL-c was 165 … x 1017. What was really interesting is that his HDL was actually a negative value.

“I suggested that he start taking the stairs to get to and from the roof from now on. Going up and down that chimney all the time was really packing on the pounds.”

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